So, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I interact with people. I’ve always prided myself on being straightforward and honest, but I’m starting to realize that maybe I’m taking it a bit too far. I mean, I’ve been told more than once that I can be a bit too blunt. It got me thinking, like, am I just being honest, or am I actually being untactful?
I started looking into what it really means to be tactful. It seems like it’s all about being polite, respectful, and just generally considerate of other people’s feelings. These are not bad things right?
Then I started to think about some specific times where I might have messed up. Like last week, I was chatting with my friend about her new painting, and instead of just saying something nice, I started giving her my thought about it. Or when I told my boss, to his face, that his presentation was a little bit boring. I didn’t mean any harm by it. In my head, I was just trying to be helpful, offering what I thought was constructive criticism. I didn’t think to consider any feelings.
- With my friend, maybe she was just looking for some encouragement, not a full-blown art lesson.
- And with my boss, well, maybe there’s a better time and place to talk about presentation styles than right after he just finished giving one.
So, I did a little experiment. For the past week, I really tried to be more mindful of how I was saying things. I tried to do these:
- Think before I speak: Instead of blurting out the first thing that came to mind.
- Consider others feeling: I tried to put myself in the other person’s shoes before saying anything.
- Find better way to express: If I did have something critical to say, I tried to phrase it in a way that was both honest and respectful.
Honestly, it wasn’t easy. It felt a little weird at first, like I wasn’t being true to myself. But I have to admit, the results were pretty interesting. People seemed to respond better to me. My friend with the painting actually thanked me for my thoughtful feedback, even though it was still critical. And my boss, well, he didn’t seem quite as annoyed with me as usual.
So, I guess what I’m learning is that there’s a big difference between being honest and being untactful. It’s not about being fake or not saying what you think. It’s about being more aware of the impact your words can have on others. And I think that’s something I really want to work on.
I’m still not perfect at it. I still catch myself saying things that I probably shouldn’t sometimes. But I’m trying, and I think that’s what matters. It’s a journey, you know? I’ll keep practicing, and hopefully, I’ll get better at this whole tact thing over time. If I keep doing that, maybe one day I could be tactful.
