So last weekend I decided to tackle the Wekopa Golf Course everyone keeps talking about. Honestly? I was kinda scared hearing all these guys brag about how tough it is. But hey, new golfer here, gotta start somewhere, right?
The “What Was I Thinking” Moment
Showed up bright and early. Paid my greens fee – ouch, that hurt the wallet already. Grabbed my rented clubs, which felt about as heavy as my grandma’s old cooking pot. First glimpse of the fairway? Holy moly. Looked like they dropped a green carpet across the damn desert, but those bunkers? They weren’t sand pits, they were canyons. Felt my palms get sweaty immediately.
The Actual Disaster Round
Stood on the first tee box, heart pounding like a drum solo. Took my first swing. Missed the ball completely. Felt like an idiot. Second try? Skied it maybe twenty yards. Embarrassing. This pretty much set the mood. Found myself stuck in more bunkers than I care to admit. That damn sand isn’t sand, it’s cement. Took three whacks just to get OUT of one.
Tried to power through the longer holes. Bad idea. My drives either sailed wildly left or plopped weakly to the right. Forget distance. My main goal became “Please, just don’t lose another ball in the cactus.” Spoiler: I lost three.
Putting greens felt like putting on a trampoline. Super fast and unpredictable. What looked like a gentle tap sent my ball racing six feet past the hole. Multiple times.
Stuff I Actually Learned (The Hard Way)
By the back nine, I was frustrated and sunburnt, but weirdly, I kinda got the hang of a few things. Or at least stopped sucking quite so badly.
- Leave the Driver in the Bag: Seriously, unless you actually know how to use that thing on wide open fairways, it’s trouble. I started using my 5-iron off the tee way more. Straighter, shorter, safer. Lost fewer balls. Still felt like a wimp sometimes, but hey, the score mattered more.
- Sand = Commitment: Those bunkers need respect. Open the clubface WIDE, aim an inch behind the ball, and swing HARD. Don’t chicken out halfway. A soft swing just buries it deeper.
- Putt Like a Sissy (At First): Seriously, baby taps only until you figure out how fast these greens really are. Even short putts need way less oomph than you think. I practiced a few long ones before starting to get the speed.
- Just Take Your Medicine: Ball buried in deep rough behind a rock? Yeah, trying to be a hero leads to double or triple bogeys. Chip out sideways. Play safe. Your scorecard will thank you later.
- Hydrate Like Mad: Arizona sun ain’t playing. Drank my whole water bottle by hole 5 and almost passed out by hole 7. Grabbed a Powerade at the turn. Rookie mistake avoided barely.
Leaving, Surprisingly Not Crying
Finished the round feeling absolutely beaten down, but not defeated. My score was… well, let’s just say it was “for my eyes only.” But I hit maybe two shots near the end that actually felt good. Like, real golfer good. That tiny spark kept me from tossing my putter into the nearest pond.
Is Wekopa hard? Abso-freaking-lutely, especially for newbies. Brutal desert landscape, fast greens, punishing bunkers. It’s a full-on test. But honestly? Humbling myself out there taught me more in one round than five perfect days on an easy course ever could.
Gotta go ice my shoulder now. Might just look at booking another tee time tomorrow though. Maybe I’m a glutton for punishment. Or maybe I just need more excuses to drink beer outdoors.
