So my husband’s been getting super into golf lately, always watching Jimmy Walker videos. Figured, hey, why not see what this “golf wife journey” thing is really about? Might learn something useful. Didn’t expect much, honestly. Just grabbed my notepad one Saturday morning and tagged along to the course, ready to observe.
The First Attempt: Major Awkwardness
Felt like a total fish outta water. Just stood there behind the ropes, kinda stiff. Tried whispering “good shot” once after his drive, but he missed it completely, focused on the ball. Felt dumb. He chipped onto the green, I immediately tried to grab his wedge to clean it like I saw the caddies do on TV – he just kinda looked confused and politely took it back himself. Awkward silence walking to the next hole.
Watching & Learning (The Hard Way)
Sat out a few holes and just stared at other partners and caddies. Noticed the stuff I totally screwed up:
- Timing matters: Blurting out stuff during his swing or intense focus? Bad move. Silence is key then.
- Small gestures: Saw a partner just hand over a fresh ball without a word when needed. Simple. Saw another quietly point out a water hazard the golfer hadn’t noticed. Helpful.
- Physical comfort: Hot day? Someone just held up an umbrella nearby. Offered a water bottle during slower moments, not mid-putt.
Also noticed things not to do: Giving swing advice (unless asked!), being loud on the phone, complaining about the pace or weather.
Trying Again: Keeping it Simple & Silent
Next round, way less chat from me. Focused on the practical things I observed:
- Stayed a few steps behind him during the shot, stayed quiet.
- Just offered the towel after he hit from the rough without asking.
- Handed him a fresh ball quietly when his drive went into the trees.
- Planned my water offers for when he was walking, not addressing the ball.
- Honestly? Mostly stayed quiet and just walked.
What Actually Clicked (Real Simple Stuff)
After a few rounds like this, realized it’s really not complicated or glamorous:
- Be Present, Be Quiet: Just physically being there without distraction is huge. Keep the talking low-key and for moments where he’s relaxed, not locked in.
- Observe Needs: See he’s sweating? Water’s nearby. Wet ball? Towel ready. Lost ball? Have a spare. Don’t ask him to micromanage you.
- Zero Pressure: Seriously, drop any expectation about his score or performance. If he snaps at a bad shot? Don’t take it personally, just let him vent. It’s the game.
- Handle Logistics: Booking the tee time? Knowing where the snacks are? Helping carry extra gear? All small things that reduce his stress.
The biggest lightbulb moment? It’s not about being a cheerleader every minute. It’s about being a steady, quiet, helpful presence. Taking a little weight off his shoulders with tiny, practical things so he can focus on the game. And honestly? Once I chilled out and stopped trying to “perform” as the perfect partner, I actually started enjoying being out on the course too. Who knew quiet time could be this useful?
