So, I started using that Citizen app a while back. Heard folks talking about it, you know, wanting to see what was happening around the neighborhood. Downloaded it, set it up, and yeah, I got kinda hooked checking the alerts. Mostly minor stuff, sometimes serious, but you get the picture.
Anyway, one evening I’m just kicking back, scrolling through my phone, not much going on. Then, bam, an alert pops up. Location wasn’t too far off, maybe a few blocks away.
The Alert That Got Me
I tap on it, right? And the description just kills me. It said something like: “Report of a man yelling incoherently at parked cars.” Okay, weird, but maybe not that weird for the city.
But then I read the details, the little user comments trickling in. Someone added, “He’s arguing with a blue sedan specifically.” Another person chimed in, “I think the sedan is winning.” I just lost it laughing. Picturing this dude having a full-blown argument with a Toyota.
I actually considered walking over, you know, just for the story. Like, how does a car win an argument? Does it just sit there, silently judging? But nah, lazy evening, decided against it. Probably just someone having a rough day, or maybe had a bit too much to drink.
Later on, the alert just kinda disappeared or got resolved. No follow-up, no news crews showing up for the great man-versus-sedan debate. It just vanished into the digital ether.
It just reminded me how wild that app can be. You get these serious alerts, sure, but mixed in are these little slices of pure, unintentional comedy. People reporting the most random stuff, and the descriptions sometimes… gold. Just absolute gold. Makes you chuckle about the absurdity of city life, I guess.
